Out of Universe Interviews- Farah the Ferret Thief

OOC: For proper context, please read this one first.
mercenaryblade.deviantart.com/…


Farah: “You can make it up to me later. How about you start asking some questions?”

The ferret looked annoyed as she stared down the foxy interviewer, but she did agree to have a sitdown with him. Without breaking stride, the Interviewer procured a paper and pen to jot down what had gone down before. The rickety castle wasn't his usual Interview room, but the weather could've been worse as he spoke.

Interviewer: Yes of course, we can do it here. Your reputation proceeds you, tales of your conquests weren't hard to find, finding you was a slightly different matter.

Farah: “I try to keep it that way. How did you find me?”

Interviewer: "Well it wasn't easy like I said. I asked around if anything it's only because you did not move around much between rumors of your activity. Someone with your pedigree can be picked out of the crowd by a sharp enough eye."

The Fox was careful in selecting his words, but he clearly admired Farah. Farah mentally noted it was time for a move.

Farah: “I see, well I can’t be absolutely invisible. Heh, could use that though.”

Interviewer: "It's to your credit I took as long as I did, to be honest. Despite my appearance, I have some experience as a mercenary. I would not want to be hunting you as a professional job. No this is purely because I think you're quite a spectacle."

Farah: “Oh? You flatter me. Please tell me more.”

Interviewer: "Well, you're almost like no other thief I've ever come to hear about...scratch that, you are definitely one of a kind. It's hard to really place your allegiances but something in me says you are not a bad person."

Farah: “Dear boy, sweetums. I am allegiant to myself of course. But though I am a thief I have ethics, I don’t kill unless I have to. I don’t steal from those who are poor, and I always wash behind my ears.”

Interviewer: “Well, hygiene is very important.”

The fox mused playfully,hoping she continued.

Farah: “So I’ll let you decide. I’m selfish, I’ll admit but there are worse people.”

Interviewer: Selfish is hardly a character flaw when you get down to it. You're a girl who knows what she wants."

Farah nodded.

“You got that right cutey. I take what I want, the more challenging the better.”

The fox blushed, stammering for a few seconds before he could get his next question up.

Interviewer: "Indeed uh...oh! Well, I'm sure a challenge is what you started out with, but may i ask where it started? Necessity? Pettiness? I am of course not meaning disrespect as I throw out guesses."

Farah: “Necessity. I grew up on the streets, I learned the basics till I was apprenticed with the thieves guild.”

Interviewer: My condolences. Not that you're unhappy currently, just that my curiosity gets the better of me and I want every angle imaginable for my showcase. Of course if you wish this part to be off the record..."

Farah: “No it’s fine. I won’t tell about thieves guild inductions or secrets though. I mastered the art and learned to fight. I refined my skills. Sleight of hand for one.”

Farah held up a small device which had been on the fox’s wrist.

Farah: “Now this is an interesting doohickey.”    

Interviewer: That's interesting, doesn't loo-...

The interviewer started to say before he recognized it as his device. He quickly felt his hand, finding the device missing from there.

Interviewer: Heh, very...very fast hands you have there. Do be careful there.

Farah: “What is it anyway?”

She asked with a smirk.

Interviewer: It’s a fairly volatile device I keep in my possession.

Farah: “If it’s volatile why keep it on your person? Seems like that is the last place you’d want it.”

She said handing is back. The Interviewer made sure he had it back before speaking.

Interviewer: "Well it's also very useful tool...like magic."

Farah: “I don’t play around with magic. Though I do have this.”

She held up a small silver talisman.

Interviewer: "Oohh, pray tell what is that? I’ll share mine if you do yours."

Farah: “It’s a ward to protect me from dark magics. Curses, evil spirits and the like. Very important to have in my line of work.”

Interviewer: "Smart. Most people in our lines of work make the mistake of not being superstitious. You have an unfortunate run in prior?"

Farah: “No I just heard stories. So I stole this little trinket for myself.”  

Interviewer: “Well that's lucky. Hmm, I have no black magic to test on you, so i hope it works out."

Farah: “Hasn’t failed yet, I had a few angry sorcerers try to hex me. It’s so funny seeing their faces when the spells fail. They get so mad.”

Interviewer: "Then you stab em?"

Farah: “Sometimes, though a lot know they can harm me indirectly, like fireballs next to me, or summoning minions.”  

Interviewer: That is a bad catch. Was just indulging some dark humor. Suppose i get to share now. Take a step back."

Farah twitched an ear before complying. The interviewer cracked his neck before raising the arm the device was on. He focused on it for a second before a fully formed 8 foot spear appeared into his hand.

Farah wrung her hands “Such magic. That is definitely a useful device, I might have to steal it again.”

He couldn’t tell if she was joking or not. Regardless, the device seemed to clamp harder onto his hand. He shook it out nervously

Interviewer: "I would prefer you not. I admire you greatly, but I wouldn hate to be responsible for whatever trouble you got into for a weapon summoner."

Farah: “That’s what it’s called huh? I’m jealous. I just have to make do with my various weapons.”

Interviewer: "It does cut down on weight, hehe. Though you're good enough to not mind"

Farah: “You think so? I prefer not to fight directly if I can, but if I’m pushed to I do.”

Interviewer: "I'm trained in plenty of methods, though my reputation and training mainly focuses on weapon combat. Though I'm flexible, trained in over 100 styles of combat."

The interviewer was extremely proud of that statement.

Farah: “Interesting, I just learned how to fight on the streets. The guild taught me the shortsword. I learned the axe myself, also picked up some more unarmed techniques.”

Interviewer: "Well it works for you. Though you also learned your craft on the streets, yes?"

Farah: “Nothing beats experience on the streets.”

Interviewer: "It equates to battle-tested, so can't disagree there. Still, my condolences...family isn't a good thing to have to live without. Err, i assume you were an orphan of sorts."

Farah merely nodded.

Interviewer: "if that's a sore topic, please let me know, I don't shut up sometimes."

Farah: “It’s not, I never knew them. I’ve learned to live without them.”

The interviewer seemed sad to hear that one.

Interviewer: “I’m sorry. Speaking personally, I’m big on family. Wish you’d had the opportunity to decide.”

Farah merely shrugged.


Farah: “I’ll never know so, no need to whine about it.”

Interviewer: “Alright, very well. We can skip those questions. You got into fights you mentioned. Any particular threats early on you had to contend with on the streets?”

Farah: “Oh so many! Rival thieves, city watch, crazy vagrants. Oh, and of course the wealthy trying to trod on me. Heh, I trod on them now. Oh, is that a priceless heirloom? Mine now!”

Farah giggled a bit.

Farah: “I do so enjoy my work.”

Interviewer: Sounds like all fun and games when you describe things. Pretty sure you had to have disdain for someone.”

Farah: “Well my first big job I made sure to go after a noble who was rude to me. Sure didn’t see that coming.”

Interviewer: “You always seem to get the upper hand in the end. Suppose that’s what makes you a fascinating person.”

Farah: “I believe in being the cleverest. You know what I mean? Thinking ahead.”

Interviewer: “The guile hero who can topple anyone with their mind, regardless of strength. Yeah, I’m familiar with the concept.”

Farah: “Never heard that term before, and I wouldn’t call myself a hero. I’m far too selfish, just being honest.”

Interviewer: “At the moment I suppose...and it’s a wordsmith’s phrase, no need to ever hear it again. So, never done anything altruistic?”

Farah: “I have a reputation to uphold. I would never do something like that.” (She nodded her head affirmative though)

Interviewer: “Ah, well, what an interesting response. Suppose I’m a big softie then. A village in trouble usually catches my eye. Then again, I’m not a member of the thieves guild.”

Farah: “Heh, well I am independent now. Too good, but not interested in being head thief.”

Interviewer: “Just don’t like making friends then? You seem a responsible sort so worry there...that couldn’t possibly be it.”

Farah: “I just operate better alone.”

Interviewer: “Shame, I’d have offered a job later now that I have you here. Oh well...so, you work alone. Don’t stick your neck out for others. Truly an enigma you are, my usual questions haven’t procured much.”

Farah: “Wait… go back to the job offer part. I can be flexible. I can work with others, it’s just you don’t know when someone will double cross you.”

Interviewer: “True. I mean, I like to put faith in people, but I do have a unit I move with...guess it makes me able to take those risks.. And if nothing else, you’ve been honest about where you stand. You’ve never had anyone you could trust...I find that saddening.”

Farah: “Spare me the pity. There was one or two. But I never stayed around longer than I needed too.”

Interviewer: “I’ve always been a band of brothers type, so I’ll spare you the pity, but it comes from an honest place. Can you tell me about them since it’s no big deal?”

Farah: “Well, there was a female fox. She and I got shanghaied for a job, robbing the biggest vault in an otter nation. We were being used by foreign powers to do their dirty work you see, there were others too. But when this band was faced with a haul of gold everyone turned on each other. Gold fever.”

She paused.

Farah: “But not her, she just wanted out of there. So did I, but we both ended up fighting the bear that was the muscle.”

Interviewer: “Was he not focused on the gold?”

Farah: “Oh he was, he wanted it all for himself and had already done in the mystic, the digger, and the insideman.”  

Interviewer: “So he just wanted to be thorough….did the Fox get out of that scuffle with you?”

Farah: “Yeah, we beat him and made a break for it. She’d hurt her leg while fighting, so I left her with a healer and some gold. I haven’t seen her sense, probably for the best. I’d like to keep memories pleasant.”  

The interviewer couldn’t hide a small smile as she finished the story.

Interviewer: “I’d like to think so. But we’ve covered I can be a fool. Still, damn decent of you to not leave her before she got the healer. If nothing else, I can trust you that far...no plans for a protege either?”

Farah: “Not yet anyway. I wouldn’t wish the thieves life for everyone, perhaps when I’m older and I meet someone who just has the gift and the desperation.”

Interviewer: “Noted. As weird as it is, I do hope you find someone. Being alone for too long sucks.”

Farah: “I make do, I love my job.”

Interviewer: “You really are a nice person.”

Farah: “That’s adorable that you think so.”

Interviewer: “Haven’t given me reason tot hink otherwise.And I’ve been trying.”

Farah: “So what do you think of me?”

Interviewer: “You adapted to a rough upbringing. Not many could’ve survived what you went through, let alone come out on top. Mostly just that. And you’ve stabbed your fair share of people. Though not as many in the back, more so face to face while they had their weapon drawn.”

Farah: “Oh, stop it. You make me sound like I’m noble or something. You’re making me blush under the fur.”

Interviewer: “I admit, I do like to put my people up on a pedestal a little bit, but it’s what I’ve gathered. I mean...so far. You’re not noble then.”

Farah: “Is being a thief noble?”

Interviewer: “Noble thieves are an oxymoron, but I’ve seen it.”

Farah: “We I just live my life, I’ll let others decide what my actions are. Noble or petty.”

Interviewer: “Except me. You don’t seem to agree with anything I see.”

Farah: “Maybe I just like arguing for the sake of it.”

Interviewer: “Ah, one of those…”

The interviewer began to chuckle. Farah smirked.

Farah: “You’ve had experience with that.”

Interviewer: “Of course I have, I’ve been around the block.”

Farah: “Well, then. You got any other questions? Want me to steal something.”

Interviewer: “No no, nothing so brief. More like...an adventure party. That’s what I eyed you for.”

She twitched her tail

Farah: “I’m listening.”

Interviewer: “I’d be willing to pay you up front for...three adventures. But uh...well, since you don’t like other people, I dunno if you’d be interested…”

Farah: “Paid up front? No,no. I can work with others.”

Interviewer: “I can’t guarantee there won’t be ego clashing. And I respect you enough to give such forewarning.”

Farah: “Appreciate that,”

Interviewer: “But you’re in. And you’ll...try, maybe even turn out half as much a good person as I think you are?”

Farah: “No guarantees.”

Interviewer: “Any guarantees you can make?”

Farah: “The job will be done.”

Interviewer: “And I want you to be safe…”

Farah: “Yes, yes. No unnecessary risks.”

Interviewer: “My client’s protections are above most other things.”

Farah: “Sure. Don’t worry yourself.”

The interviewer just smirked at that before holding a hand to shake on the deal. Farah took it.

Farah: “What now?”

Interviewer: “Well, I’m paying you so I’d say we’re close to friends. One second.”

The interviewer turned his back to Farah before walking over to a nearby column to retrieve something, his guard completely down and the money most likely there. Farah considered going through it, but that was bad business with an employer. The Interviewer took a bit to grab it, almost like an invitation to backstab him and take the cash. She resisted the temptation. If he turned out to be a bad employer though, she’d rob him blind.

Interviewer: “There we go, sorry bout that. Just had to count it all,”

With that, the Interviewer handed three bags full of gold. His arm seemed a bit tired as he held it.

Interviewer: “3500 gold pieces. That’s the currency here, right?”

Farah: “Correct.”  

Interviewer: “That seem excessive in any way?”

Farah: “What’s excessive? I have no concept of that word.”

Interviewer: “Then is this amount enough?”

Farah: “It will suffice,”

Interviewer: “Excellent. There may be more in it for you if things go well. I trust you’ll be worth every pence”

And like that, he handed over the gold

Farah: “I am to please.” Farah said with a grin.

Interviewer: “Good, my standards are fairly high, but understandable. These will be at later dates, can you handle a need to know basis?”

Farah: “That depends, I’m curious by nature. But if it’s vague enough that I can make some guesses I can handle it.”

Interviewer: “Of course. These are primarily for your safety of course, as we covered. Do you have a place to stay tonight?”

Farah: “The Rusty Dagger, Inn.”

Interviewer: “Then we’re good here. It’s been a pleasure…you really aren’t a bad girl. Definitely won’t refuse a generous offer, but that’s hardly anything.

The interviewer held out a hand for her again and Farah shook it.

Farah: “I promise I did not just pick your pocket. I’ll be waiting to hear from you.”

With that, the Interviewer picked up his brimmed hat before tipping it, doing his best to be charming and telling her she was free to go. Farah collected her things, pulled her cloak around her and slipped away.